The Guru has return! She has return to the Heart. Portland has an undiscovered Guru who teaches the same teachings Yeshua taught some two thousand years ago. Loving what is… Loving yourself… Loving your own body… Loving your circumstance that you’re in… Loving your environment.
Yeshua said, “Know ye not you are gods?” By that he meant you have the power to change your life… your circumstance… your environment. Mahatma Gandhi said, “Be the change you want see.”
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Charles Jason Howard
There is a Twenty-six year old man reportedly running around Moscow Idaho with my DNA. I haven’t seen this young man since 1992 when he came to visit me in Aloha, Oregon. Aloha is a community just west of Beaverton. I live there with my second wife, Pamela.
Charles Jason was born on this date in 1982 at the University of Utah Hospital in Salt Lake City, UT. A fond memory of Charlie, the name I gave him while of toddler age, would go on excursions with me on errands around the city of his birth.
I lived with him for the first five yearsof his life until his mother and I were divorce in early 1988. I was granted visitation rights until my relocation from Coos Bay to Portland in August of that year.
I don’t know much about his life from that point except from phone call reports of trouble with the law extending from drug abuse issues. Charles and his two siblings came from a broken home, were raised by their grandfather and grandmother in Bandon and Rouge River Oregon.
In 1990, after hearing of my second marriage, Charles’ mother change his Sir name to Howard.
Epilogue: I could not acknowledge Charles as my son five years ago. The only picture I have of him is in a triple heart-shape frame along with his younger sisters sitting on my relationship altar in my bedroom.
Many Blessings.
Charles Jason was born on this date in 1982 at the University of Utah Hospital in Salt Lake City, UT. A fond memory of Charlie, the name I gave him while of toddler age, would go on excursions with me on errands around the city of his birth.
I lived with him for the first five yearsof his life until his mother and I were divorce in early 1988. I was granted visitation rights until my relocation from Coos Bay to Portland in August of that year.
I don’t know much about his life from that point except from phone call reports of trouble with the law extending from drug abuse issues. Charles and his two siblings came from a broken home, were raised by their grandfather and grandmother in Bandon and Rouge River Oregon.
In 1990, after hearing of my second marriage, Charles’ mother change his Sir name to Howard.
Epilogue: I could not acknowledge Charles as my son five years ago. The only picture I have of him is in a triple heart-shape frame along with his younger sisters sitting on my relationship altar in my bedroom.
Many Blessings.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
I Create Love Wherever I Go
The act of Breathing is the act of Love, itself.
~ Manasseh
What is this embodiment of love? I don’t understand it. My Guru has disappeared… Vanish into thin air. Taking a piece of my heart. When I dwell on it too much, it hurts.
Manasseh: “Get out of your head and into body. Closed your eyes and breathe slow and deeply.”
Some two thousand years ago, Yeshua walked the earth, teaching his followers the embodiment of love. He told them, “This and greater things ye shall do.” He wanted them to be Self-aware…Self-realization…self love.
Manasseh: “Know thy self and you shall love thy self.”
My Soul’s contract was to incarnate into a body to learn Love… Forgiveness… Compassion… Gratitude… Generosity… Wisdom… and Peace. As I progress on my journey hitting the four year mark, I’m wondering if I am to not only to embody Love… but to embody Forgiveness… embody Compassion… embody Gratitude… embody Generosity… embody Wisdom… and embody Peace.
Crashing a Friday night session of Mystical Activism, I wrote on a 3 x 5 card, I am a Mystic… I am a Sage… I am an Avatar… I am a Master. The Universe is accelerating my growth. A night I will never forget, where I sat in a circle of highly evolve student gurus. Incarnated beings as Aminga, Autumn, Blaine, Christine, Danielle, Gene, Lisa, Martie, Melt, Pamlea and Ra.
In the dim lit room, there was one who face’s glow with the light of Yeshua. I remembered feeling the love energy emanating from her heart as her smile warmly welcome me. At the same time, there was one with a destine look on their face as if to say, how dare you barge in and invade our space. I kept my attention upon the teacher of Christ-like love.
It is none of my business who ever wronged me… who dislikes me… who does not pays attention to me. I have loan thousands of dollars to people who have never pay me back. I let it go… it’s none of my business. Some people just don’t like me or want to hang out with me. There is nothing I can do about it. I just go on my way. There are people I have a high regard for and admire who look right through me as if I don’t even exist. They pay no regards to my presences. Should I be crying? I don’t think so.
I like myself the way I am. The divine self. I admire my higher self… The God-Self. The wisdom that exists inside of me. Big deal if I have the TV on for background noise while I compose my blog posts or download my music. I don’t care if people do not read my blog anymore. Mote It Be.
Many Blessings.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Commentary On Polygamy
Four hundred sixteen children could have a new lease on life this week all because one young teenager was brave enough to stand in her own authentic self and blow the whistle on her polygamist lifestyle. With the dramatic alteration in a way of life comes the state of fear, which is blindness to the road ahead. In their fear, they cannot understand their liberation from the male ego gone arrive.
This is what happens when the male ego goes uncheck. Men, who think they can play God, control and dominate their wives and children like cattle. These women and children are clueless to what freedom taste like… Smells like… Feels like… Or even looks like. The news media have portrait the expression on the faces as if they were zombies… Void of life and vitality. Is this what happens when you have been repeatedly rape by a man you were force into arrange marriage of sickness? Their spirits are either dead or barely on life-support while their bodies maintain survival mode.
After years of molestation, incest and endless years of abuse, this community just may see their first glimpses of the light at the end of the tunnel. I see the eventual end for this polygamist sect as mere facts the leader of the male ego is behind bars and their Texas compound raided. The Universe seeks balance in all things. We shell see more light penetrate the darkness as higher consciousness of love and light enters the world.
It is my hope and prayers for the women and children of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints will seek professional help and continue on to paths of enlightenment to heal their broken spirits. Out of the abyss of darkness they climb the path of difficulty.
Many Blessings to the women and children who have been hurt.
This is what happens when the male ego goes uncheck. Men, who think they can play God, control and dominate their wives and children like cattle. These women and children are clueless to what freedom taste like… Smells like… Feels like… Or even looks like. The news media have portrait the expression on the faces as if they were zombies… Void of life and vitality. Is this what happens when you have been repeatedly rape by a man you were force into arrange marriage of sickness? Their spirits are either dead or barely on life-support while their bodies maintain survival mode.
After years of molestation, incest and endless years of abuse, this community just may see their first glimpses of the light at the end of the tunnel. I see the eventual end for this polygamist sect as mere facts the leader of the male ego is behind bars and their Texas compound raided. The Universe seeks balance in all things. We shell see more light penetrate the darkness as higher consciousness of love and light enters the world.
It is my hope and prayers for the women and children of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints will seek professional help and continue on to paths of enlightenment to heal their broken spirits. Out of the abyss of darkness they climb the path of difficulty.
Many Blessings to the women and children who have been hurt.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Transmuting The Male Ego In Hood River
Today, I took a road trip to Bonneville Dam and Hood River with Jeff Smith. We stop in Troutdale to fuel up our bodies with a late breakfast. Jeff wanted to stop at the fish ladders and visitors center at Bonneville Dam. We watch as a five-foot long Chinook salmon struggle against the current to swim up stream. I thought about the male ego and its struggle against the flow of the Universe.
In Hood River, I stop to shop in a nice gift store. I found two lovely gifts for two beloved friends, but nothing for that special lady my heart is so fond of – oh uh. I darted into a next door restaurant to use the restroom while Jeff waited for me. When I came out, I bump into a friend from the Sacred Circle Dance community who recently moved to Hood River to clear his mind and to be surrounded by nature.
Even though Jeff was in a rush to be home by a certain time, he was patient enough while I visit with my friend. We talk about the male ego and the role it plays on our psyche and how it contaminates our hearts.
Manasseh: “Blog with tact and sensitivity.”
Peter: “Hello Manasseh. I am. I very much want to be sensitive.”
He reminds me of myself when I was young and in my ego mind. I would try to control or dominate the relationship. When that didn’t work, I would sabotage the relationship by throwing a fit and running away like a child. What I didn’t realize back in my youth is a Woman is like unto a butterfly. You have to hold your hand open and leave it open throughout the relationship. If she lands in your hand, you are bless by receiving her love. That doesn’t mean you can close up your hand and hold her captive. It is my belief and profound understanding she meant to be free to come and go as her heart so chooses.
I hope with all the tenderness and care, it will go both ways as in any relationship. And when she is ready to leave your hand, you will have the love and the compassion still holding out your hand as she fly’s away. Yes, there will be sadness in your heart. That is when you go inside and know God… Your true self. Breathe in Yeshua. Breathe out you God-self.
Manasseh: “Yes Peter. Exactly.
As we drove home, west bound on I – 84, the rain showers would come overhead and block out the sun. The rain clouds represents my male ego mind blocking out the true source of love. My mind race down the freeway along side the Columbia River screaming at me, “Dump this woman before she hurts you!”
No, I won’t! I will risk everything for one night of sacred intimacy. My heart is wild open ready to receive sacred love. Than I shell let her go like a butterfly. And she will be gone and I will again become acquainted with the pain of a broken heart. My heart will than be crack open only to be fill up with love of Yeshua.
Manasseh: “You are so bold to declare love on the Internet.”
Peter: “Yes, I am open and vulnerable. I don’t care who sees me in my nakedness. I love her… We all love her.”
Many Blessings.
In Hood River, I stop to shop in a nice gift store. I found two lovely gifts for two beloved friends, but nothing for that special lady my heart is so fond of – oh uh. I darted into a next door restaurant to use the restroom while Jeff waited for me. When I came out, I bump into a friend from the Sacred Circle Dance community who recently moved to Hood River to clear his mind and to be surrounded by nature.
Even though Jeff was in a rush to be home by a certain time, he was patient enough while I visit with my friend. We talk about the male ego and the role it plays on our psyche and how it contaminates our hearts.
Manasseh: “Blog with tact and sensitivity.”
Peter: “Hello Manasseh. I am. I very much want to be sensitive.”
He reminds me of myself when I was young and in my ego mind. I would try to control or dominate the relationship. When that didn’t work, I would sabotage the relationship by throwing a fit and running away like a child. What I didn’t realize back in my youth is a Woman is like unto a butterfly. You have to hold your hand open and leave it open throughout the relationship. If she lands in your hand, you are bless by receiving her love. That doesn’t mean you can close up your hand and hold her captive. It is my belief and profound understanding she meant to be free to come and go as her heart so chooses.
I hope with all the tenderness and care, it will go both ways as in any relationship. And when she is ready to leave your hand, you will have the love and the compassion still holding out your hand as she fly’s away. Yes, there will be sadness in your heart. That is when you go inside and know God… Your true self. Breathe in Yeshua. Breathe out you God-self.
Manasseh: “Yes Peter. Exactly.
As we drove home, west bound on I – 84, the rain showers would come overhead and block out the sun. The rain clouds represents my male ego mind blocking out the true source of love. My mind race down the freeway along side the Columbia River screaming at me, “Dump this woman before she hurts you!”
No, I won’t! I will risk everything for one night of sacred intimacy. My heart is wild open ready to receive sacred love. Than I shell let her go like a butterfly. And she will be gone and I will again become acquainted with the pain of a broken heart. My heart will than be crack open only to be fill up with love of Yeshua.
Manasseh: “You are so bold to declare love on the Internet.”
Peter: “Yes, I am open and vulnerable. I don’t care who sees me in my nakedness. I love her… We all love her.”
Many Blessings.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Calling Forth Love
My cohorts seem to be silent this week. It might be my turn to speak up in terms of holding the bloggedsphere open for my beloveds.
Reflecting back on the last four years since I started out on this journey with the first steps by leaving an intuition of dogma doctrine, which held me spellbound for a great portion of my life. As my evolvement commence, I notice my discontentment for the LDS Church has steadily diminish over time. Remembering at that point of turning my back and walking away from something that have cause suffering in my life… Feeling the feelings of anger and bitterness for wasted time and energy.
Setting out on my new path, hoping it will lead me to fulfillment… Something real and lasting. But first, learning to let go of the ego and being fully honest with myself. I was having new experiences and meeting healthy vibrant people. Within the last year, I connected with the Sacred Circle Dance community and I was attracted by the energy and vitality of certain females. I knew they wouldn’t be attracted to me. To let go of this pain, I would close my eyes and breathe in Yeshua, breathe out Manasseh. I can feel my own breath inside of me. The God inside of me have been in love with me for over fifty years.
A guess speaker at Celebration Church this past Sunday. Charlie Heavenrich, a river mystic from the Grand Canyon, made this profound statement: “The ego is only attached to things outside of ourselves, which are impermanent.” Charlie talk about how his heart was broken… Crack open only to be fill up with love.
Yes Beloveds, the game of love is a hard game to play. But it become easy when you know who loves you first.
Maybe I’m not looking for a Soulmate like I thought I was, but a lover. A long time friend who I met when I join the Mormon Church, Dan Hastings, was manifesting a Soulmate but ended up with a lover. He is enjoying himself in this new relationship. He doesn’t know how long it will last, at lease he’s living in the moment. What am I? Chopped liver? Am I good enough as Dan to manifest a love life? I placed my order with the Universe.
Many Blessings.
Reflecting back on the last four years since I started out on this journey with the first steps by leaving an intuition of dogma doctrine, which held me spellbound for a great portion of my life. As my evolvement commence, I notice my discontentment for the LDS Church has steadily diminish over time. Remembering at that point of turning my back and walking away from something that have cause suffering in my life… Feeling the feelings of anger and bitterness for wasted time and energy.
Setting out on my new path, hoping it will lead me to fulfillment… Something real and lasting. But first, learning to let go of the ego and being fully honest with myself. I was having new experiences and meeting healthy vibrant people. Within the last year, I connected with the Sacred Circle Dance community and I was attracted by the energy and vitality of certain females. I knew they wouldn’t be attracted to me. To let go of this pain, I would close my eyes and breathe in Yeshua, breathe out Manasseh. I can feel my own breath inside of me. The God inside of me have been in love with me for over fifty years.
A guess speaker at Celebration Church this past Sunday. Charlie Heavenrich, a river mystic from the Grand Canyon, made this profound statement: “The ego is only attached to things outside of ourselves, which are impermanent.” Charlie talk about how his heart was broken… Crack open only to be fill up with love.
Yes Beloveds, the game of love is a hard game to play. But it become easy when you know who loves you first.
Maybe I’m not looking for a Soulmate like I thought I was, but a lover. A long time friend who I met when I join the Mormon Church, Dan Hastings, was manifesting a Soulmate but ended up with a lover. He is enjoying himself in this new relationship. He doesn’t know how long it will last, at lease he’s living in the moment. What am I? Chopped liver? Am I good enough as Dan to manifest a love life? I placed my order with the Universe.
Many Blessings.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Is Celebration Church Ready For Anakha Coman?
For months now, I have this overwhelming desire for my Guru to come and speak at Celebration Church. I’ve been working hard this week to coordinate this.
In the process I found some resistances. There has been excuse after excuse not view her video web blog; i.e. we don’t have time to view her blogs. Can you send us a CD or a DVD of her speaking?
I have been working with Gene to put together selected video blogs of Anakha into a DVD package for Celebration Church to view. After watching all eleven video segments and trying to pick out which video to put on the DVD. It occurred to me may be they're not ready for the wildness of Anakha.
I E-mail Gene back: SHE IS SO AWSON!! My two favorite video are "Manifesting" the I Am that I Am and Embodying God -- Our Erotic Awakening. Wish we can post all 11 videos on one DVD, so they can get the whole range of Anakha's spiritual favors. In my opinion if they can't handle Anakha's erotic demeanor then they are not ready for Anakha at all. I wouldn’t want to change her so she can fit in to their mold. She is too authentic for that. Why cover up her true wildness just to speak at a church?
I question the fact why we have to make something better? Why do need to change something around just to fit someone else paradigm? I say if you don't like the package that it comes in, than don't buy it. The same goes for our own bodies -- if they're not broken, why fix it? Our culture is obsess with their body makeover, namely plastic surgery. Why do we have to have some better?
So Jimmy... Why did you remake your movie, The Moses Code? Didn't you like the first version?
I don't know if I want to hear Anakha speak at Celebration Church if I can't experience her in her full mystical eroticism. If you take that part away, you mind well take God away too.
Many Blessings.
In the process I found some resistances. There has been excuse after excuse not view her video web blog; i.e. we don’t have time to view her blogs. Can you send us a CD or a DVD of her speaking?
I have been working with Gene to put together selected video blogs of Anakha into a DVD package for Celebration Church to view. After watching all eleven video segments and trying to pick out which video to put on the DVD. It occurred to me may be they're not ready for the wildness of Anakha.
I E-mail Gene back: SHE IS SO AWSON!! My two favorite video are "Manifesting" the I Am that I Am and Embodying God -- Our Erotic Awakening. Wish we can post all 11 videos on one DVD, so they can get the whole range of Anakha's spiritual favors. In my opinion if they can't handle Anakha's erotic demeanor then they are not ready for Anakha at all. I wouldn’t want to change her so she can fit in to their mold. She is too authentic for that. Why cover up her true wildness just to speak at a church?
I question the fact why we have to make something better? Why do need to change something around just to fit someone else paradigm? I say if you don't like the package that it comes in, than don't buy it. The same goes for our own bodies -- if they're not broken, why fix it? Our culture is obsess with their body makeover, namely plastic surgery. Why do we have to have some better?
So Jimmy... Why did you remake your movie, The Moses Code? Didn't you like the first version?
I don't know if I want to hear Anakha speak at Celebration Church if I can't experience her in her full mystical eroticism. If you take that part away, you mind well take God away too.
Many Blessings.
Manifesting God -- Manifesting Love
Lets start back at the beginning… I was raised as an atheist. My father told me God does not exist. My childhood friend did believe in the existence of God, as did the greater portion of the world’s population. I became a seeker. I seek God outside of myself… something to believe in.
You know my story… my journey from previous posts from this blog. There is not the need to rehearse the story of my journey.
Something to believe in… I believe in that something called Love. I response to love. Before I entered into relationship… my marriages, I remembered punishing myself because I was not good enough. I manifested abuse and unkindness in my two relationships with those two woman. I remembered shutting down and saying to myself, ‘I only response to love.’
I am that, I am! I am that, (pause) I am! I am love, I am! I manifested three divine Gurus who embody love. I believe in Anakha, Gene and David. The greatest lovers I ever met. The Big Bang in my heart. I have found God. My seeking has ended.
I love you Manasseh! I love you Anakha! I love you Gene! I love you David! I am one with God! I am one with you!
Happy Birthday My Beloved Anakha. I love you! – Many Blessings.
You know my story… my journey from previous posts from this blog. There is not the need to rehearse the story of my journey.
Something to believe in… I believe in that something called Love. I response to love. Before I entered into relationship… my marriages, I remembered punishing myself because I was not good enough. I manifested abuse and unkindness in my two relationships with those two woman. I remembered shutting down and saying to myself, ‘I only response to love.’
I am that, I am! I am that, (pause) I am! I am love, I am! I manifested three divine Gurus who embody love. I believe in Anakha, Gene and David. The greatest lovers I ever met. The Big Bang in my heart. I have found God. My seeking has ended.
I love you Manasseh! I love you Anakha! I love you Gene! I love you David! I am one with God! I am one with you!
Happy Birthday My Beloved Anakha. I love you! – Many Blessings.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Forty Years Ago
Martin Luther King Jr. was assassinated on a Memphis hotel balcony. A woman in Portland, Oregon name Karen Coman was nine months pregnant was about delivered a healthy baby girl any day. Me… I was ten years old and in the third grade.
One peacemaker leaves the planet and a few days later another peacemaker arrives on the planet. WOW!
One peacemaker leaves the planet and a few days later another peacemaker arrives on the planet. WOW!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
