Love Be Not Afraid

Are you afraid to love me?
Are you afraid to touch me?
Are you afraid to caress me?
Are you afraid to hold me?
Are you afraid to know me?
Are you afraid to dance with me?
Are you afraid I cannot offer you love?
When you look at me, what do you see?

Or are you afraid of your own inability to show up? I show up all the time. Why can’t you show up for me?

I once dated a woman for one week whom I was very much in love with. She told me she loved me. She wanted to hang out with me for while and see how she can deal with the CP. She said she was mad at God for giving me a physical handicap.

I was in my ego and my insecurity sabotage the relationship. I drove her away from me in less than a week. The question is when others people break our hearts, do we do it to ourselves? I told Anakha last week as we drove in to McMinnville where another former girlfriend live, broke my heart. She did not break my heart. I did it to myself.

You might ask how did I break my own heart? When we are in our ego and our insecurities take over, we allow fear, not love, to rule our hearts. The flame of love is thus smother and no one can breathe. The relationship is deprive of oxygen and light. Love between two people, the relationship, is like unto a plant, needs oxygen and light in order to grow. The next relationship I entered into will be open and allow to breathe love and life.

There are already feelings stirrings in my heart for a woman. How do I know? She appears in my unconscious dreams night after night cradling each of her beloveds, healing them of their distorted pain. She has many beloveds that are intoxicated by her because of who she is: Genuine: Authentic: The full embodiment of love: The embodiment of the Christ consciousness.

And to think I almost threw it away one day. I thought I was not good enough for the Christic to fill my being with pure love. Love that’s heals the distorted pain. I made a passing comment to the oracle of love embody, “I’m not your type.” I lied. I am your type. I am everyones type. When will I stop sabotaging love?

I am ready for love to show up. No matter what form love shows up as, I will not sabotage it. I will not be afraid of it.

Love and Blessings.