Awakening In Death

I am Manasseh. I am the prefect love of God. There is too much life force in this body to give up now. I have too much vital energy to throw in the towel.

My dad expressed to me, “The day I can no longer wipe my own butt is the day I pull the plug on my life.” Of course he express these sentiments back when I was still in my finite “Mormon” brain. In my limited understanding of the Right To Die, I rile against him. I demanded to know what gave him the right to played god with his life. Little did I know it was his God-given birthright to do this about anything he wanted to do with his life! My dad has made his life comfortable for himself and for those around him.

Today, I experience for the first time the Oregon Death with Dignity Act. A co-worker friend, a member of the Tigard Home Depot family, chose to take his own life. After a long illness with difficulties breathing and being in a great deal of physical pain, after Ronnie said his good-byes to family and friends, ended his life this morning. I observe somberness, sadness and disturbances in my co-workers this morning when it was announced Ronnie was gone. The disturbances in some of my co-workers who cannot accept the choice Ronnie had made reminded me of the time where I was many years ago. There were some co-workers who were close to Ronnie didn’t come in to work today couldn’t cope with his lost.

In my awakening, I have learned we have the God-given right to choose to end our life at a time when the life force is fading or when the physical body no longer function to serves it purpose in comfort without the use of drugs. I respect Ronnie’s choice and echo my dad’s sentiments, I will be damn if I let someone feed me or wipe my ass at the end of my life. I am no longer a Mormon; I do not need to suffer until the “bitter-shity” end, as Ronnie would say.